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A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks.

The first is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. As he does this a huge

fish jumps out and bites him. To show the others whose boss, he beats it to

death with a spade. Realizing his employer won't be best pleased, he

disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything.

Moving on to the second job of clearing out the chimpanzee house, he is

attacked by the chimps who pelt him with coconuts. He swipes at two chimps

with a spade, killing them both.

He hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure. He moves on to the last job,

which is to collect honey from the South American Bees. As soon as he starts

he is attacked and stung by the bees. He grabs the spade and smashes the

bees to a pulp. By now he knows what to do and throws them into the lion's

cage. Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo. He wanders up to another lion and says, "What's the food like here?"

The other lions say, "Absolutely brilliant. Today we had fish and chimps with mushy bees."
 

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Nooooooooooooooooooooo!!
 

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Job of a lifetime

TRUE STORY: Outside Bristol Zoo there is a car park where cars and coaches can park. There was also a nice bloke with a hat and ticket machine charging cars £1 and coaches £5. This parking attendant worked there for about 25 years , then one day didn't turn up for work...Ho hum say Bristol Zoo management- Better phone up Bristol City Council and get them to send a new parking attendant......Err no say the Council...That car park is your responsibility...Err no say Bristol Zoo the attendant was employed by you wasn't he....Err NO!!!!

Sitting in his villa in Spain is a bloke who had been taking the car park takings for Bristol Zoo for the last 25 years....
 

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1,073 Posts
Job of a lifetime

TRUE STORY: Outside Bristol Zoo there is a car park where cars and coaches can park. There was also a nice bloke with a hat and ticket machine charging cars £1 and coaches £5. This parking attendant worked there for about 25 years , then one day didn't turn up for work...Ho hum say Bristol Zoo management- Better phone up Bristol City Council and get them to send a new parking attendant......Err no say the Council...That car park is your responsibility...Err no say Bristol Zoo the attendant was employed by you wasn't he....Err NO!!!!

Sitting in his villa in Spain is a bloke who had been taking the car park takings for Bristol Zoo for the last 25 years....
lol....
 
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